Thinking Of......?

I haven't been a frequent blogger like I first created this blog, huh? lol. I've been lazy to blog. Sorry for those who looks forward to my blog. Anyways, Things has been going fine lately, but it also has its own cons. What is life without pros and cons? A lifeless one. lol. =) Well, I've been thinking a lot lately and I couldn't help but to think about what the future have for in store for me. With my ever so bad results, I don't think I can go anywhere. I can't wait for my room to be done! Then only I can finally study properly.

Well, the future. I know I want to take up psychology as my course but I don't know if that is wise. I don't think it is though. Ah, what the heck. Well, been depressed a lot lately too. (Since when I am not? lol.) Been thinking a lot and moreover I have shit up my ass too. Lol. That is such a weird term. haha.

You know, I hate being right all the time. I mean at times it is fun to be right but you will reach a point where you just don't want to be right anymore. It feels like a curse. For example, I was right when I thought Charlene is most probably migrating to Australia even before she tells me about it. I already knew when I was back in form 3. Next, I knew people will use me for their own purposes. I was right. Next, I knew my family is bound to be broken. I was right. Next, I knew people I dear will leave me for personal reasons. And again, I was right. I hate being right all the time. Like I said earlier, it feels like a curse but also a gift. I guess I should be thankful.

Friends. I love them with all my heart. I do. But sometimes, I need more than just friends, I need someone I could count on no matter where they are or what they are doing. In other words, a boyfriend. At times I feel helpless without someone close. Like now, for example. This is one of the times I need someone just to melt my heart unintentionally. I feel so helpless now. And at time, I feel there is no need to have a guy in life for now. It is very confusing if you ask me. This is weird topic for me. I am always those "I don't give a shit" type. But you know, sometimes, people needs to be loved too.

Dreams. I had so many dreams about me falling in love. And it feels so so good. It feels as if you you are floating. With that warm hugs and kisses that wipe your fears away. Not caring about everything in the world but ourselves. It sucks to know it is just a dream. You woke up happy but when it hits you, it is just another lame ass dream. Lol. It sucks to know.

Ain't this unusual? For me to say all this? I find it weird. lol. Anyways, that's more than enough to last a week. hahaha. Till next time. See yahs, and may God bless you all. =)