"Let the head do the talking. Heart, stay the fuck out"

Sometimes all we need is just some company; some company to makes us feel a 'lil better, some company to make us a little less alone, and some company to keep us going. Yeah..all we need is some company. I know I tend to feel lonely, especially when my hormones decides to eat me up, but loneliness is something I cannot help feeling. It's written all over me (no kidding). I wish loneliness is not something one have to face, but it indeed is. I wish I could runaway and not think of it, but dang, I can't. I just..can't.

Sometimes all we need is some reassurance; the same reassurance that one friend give to another, the same reassurance that will keep another sane, and the same reassurance that will binds two individuals together. Yeah..reassurance..Haven't got that in a while now. I did, sort of though; and that is one reassurance that I need to keep on going. But, is it enough?..Conclusion is that we are still human beings, and human beings constantly needs more and more. As greedy as I may sound, but, I need to hear them somehow. Or perhaps I am just imbalance.

Is it this hard to get a positive stroke? Yes. Yes, it is. It is indeed very hard to. To me at least. I, for one, never really had a proper positive stroke (word or physically). It has always been negative or none at all. Most of the time it's none at all. lol. Nowadays though, I've been getting bits and pieces from my parents, but...it is way too late for me to feel it. I am no longer in the stage where family comes to play. I guess there is also a good side to this. Being able to stand loneliness like no other; sure it is torturing, but I can stand it like a lot can't, and I'm thankful for that..I guess?

aih..this is torturing. Having imbalanced hormones without having a proper reason to commence any conversation to make myself feel a 'lil less alone. Gosh. aih..awh well..gotta live with it for the next few days. Just when we think having a reason to be depressed is bad; try having absolutely no reason to be depressed. It's torture. Plain, cruel, emotional torture.

I think I should leave now. toodles. take care all.

-over and out-

LaneHoz:
what's more torturing than leaving me a whole day without food?
it is me having imbalance hormones with absolutely no reason for me to talk, vent or cry.
my gosh. this is torturing.