Random thoughts.

Just the random thoughts that pop into my mind.

I love my friends. I know they know. I just want to show them that I do. How?..Is it possible to show? No. Tried it so many times. Doubt they saw it. I think they did. But forgotten. Maybe I'm trying to hard. No one knows. This isn't in proper grammar form. Random. What ever happens tomorrow?..Fear of being forgotten. Nothing lasts forever. Even believed. Can always try?..Nah. Tomorrow, unknown. Should I?..Nope. No such thing as real. Maybe there is. Who knows. I want truth. Hard to keep, easy to forget. Me.

The Guitar Performance.

Yesterday I went to somewhere near Jalan Ipoh with Vincent and some of his students to a place that looks like an International School. My parents followed his car to the place and God, it was so secluded! haha. That place is called Lycée François. Wow. A french name. lol! That place was awesome! Nothing like our government school, it has gymnasiums, swimming pool, etc. haha. I feel jealousy in my veins. lol. Anyways, I went there for a classical guitar recital. It was played by this french guy. He was awesome! He has got so many tricks he can play using the guitar. Ah yes, the art of guitaring is sure a beauty! :D However, sad to say, that I don't remember the guitarist's name haha! He was a famous guitarist in France and now he is going all over the world. It's awesome! The hall that he performed in, was, wow...It's nothing like our school hall! lol. It actually make u feel like you're in an expensive orchestra house. lol. Let me show u some of the pictures I've took during his performance. :D


Before the performance. duhh...lol


There's that dude.


he looks like Mika!

LOL!. Yes indeed he looks like Mika. lol. After the performance, it was quite late and I still haven't had my dinner!! lol. So we decided to go to Jalan Pahang to have some Bei Ke! Omgs...*droolz...* It tastes so good! Sorry I didn't get to take the picture. I was sooooo hungry! lol! Oh yes, and thank you Vincent for the tickets! It was superb and awesome! lol. Gonna see him again later for class. haha. Having a guitar teacher is awesome! lol. Anyways, that's all from me. See ya! ;)

Experiencing Heartbreak.

Have you ever have one of those feeling where your heart aches non-stop, your throat just feels like something there, blocking your appetite and your stomach feels like it's going round and round? Yes, ladies and gentlemen, that's what I call, a heartbreak. I am currently going through that right now, and mind you, it doesn't feel good. It feels rather annoying and it's freaking painful! hahaha. And something even funnier is that, I got to know this feel, not from a breakup, but, from a family problem. lol. And God! It's fucking painful. haha. The feel is extraordinary. It's so painful, you just want to rip your heart out. Hahaha. I finally feel how Pig felt during a breakup. But haha. I ain't crying. Holding it in, I guess. I'm sick and tired of tears flowing down cause of the pain I feel. Haha. I'm rather immune to it already, I guess. haha. Thank God for friends, they were plenty of help. I get to talk to a friend in need and I felt so good right after. haha. Ironic isn't it?..lol. Anyways, that's it from me. tata.

awhness..

one short sentence i would like to say...
I love my friends soooo fucking much!!!...

omgs..late night cravings!!

I AM FUCKING CRAVING FOR A CLASSIFIED CHICKEN FROM DOMINO'S RIGHT NOWWW!!!! hahaha..this is random btw..hehehe..it's 4.30am and I'm still running on caffeine that I drank at 10pm!!! hahahaah..Not a wise thing to do eh?...hahahhahaha! LOL!!...

The Flash Backs

OMG! lol! School's out! FOR REAL!! lol. I'm gonna miss the moments I had in high school. Personally, I have to thank Nick for his wake up call. His blog made me realize the times I had, isn't all bad. lol. THANK YOU!! A LOT!! I'm gonna belanja you something one day..Shall I bring you to the nearest mamak?..hehe..Well, I know I said that it was such relief to leave school and all. Don't get me wrong, I do, but, the moments and memories I had..Priceless I have to say. Funny if you recall how and what had happened in the past 5 years. It was hilarious! LOL!! And the times in primary school, and primary school dramas..lol! Funny weiihh..I am truly blessed with friends that catch my tears and friends that catch me when I fall. I am truly thankful for their existence. I did actually wonder, what my life be if I don't know them?..What would happen to me?..God knows and I don't intend to find out myself! lol.

First person here I gotta tell the world about is, Nicholas Yeoh!!..Recently he got himself a new middle name, which is his confirmation name, Stewart. So, Nicholas Stewart Yeoh, thanks again for this wake up call!..We've known each other for God knows how long..The first time we met, was a total blur but what I really remember was, he was the only friend I had back in primary school when my friends left me behind. I can be considered as the social outcast. But yeahh, he was around me during primary 2..All de freaking time! lol. I was so thankful to have a friend back then cause I didn't have anyone. That is why I cherish friends so much..lol. Yeah, Nick, you have changed my life by putting hope in me..I was crushed by the fact I was alone back then but you came to me and ever since then, we're friends till now!! haha! Amazing, simply amazing. We were at a point of no talking for a while when we went to high school..For 2 years to be exact. But after we end up in the same class..lol. The magic happened by itself again. lol. God is powderful! hehe.

Hahaha! The second person I want to mention is Maitthreyan!! This jackass! lol. I remember last time in primary school, I got whacked up by my dad cause of him! In front of the class!! lol! But anyhow, he apologized afterwards..lol. I am such a nice person! ish. lol. Anyways, this fella here, we used to hang out like freaking a lot! I remember the whole school doesn't like him but I said "He's ok to me. He's nice! Wth you're talking about?!" lol! I remember the whole powerpuff song we used to tease! lol! Especially the purple puff..Bunny?..If I'm not mistaken..hahahaha!! We used to laugh and play and laugh even more! Not caring what people thinks. He was a trouble-maker la but seriously, like all boys, you don't kacau them, they don't kacau you. So, yeah, can't blame him there. lol. I love that bastard la! Such an idiot! lol We laughed our ass off when we're in the bus together last time and all sort! haha. Fella still contact me and all la..But sadly, he ain't around here anymore..He shifted..lol but still can manage!! lol!

Third, third, third!!! JIE JUAN!!!! JJ!!! JJ CHEAH!! lol. God damn this idiot! lol. I remember in primary school, fella defend himself like don't know what!! lol. I kena la for certain things I'm not supposed to but haha! I can't blame the fella, seriously. lol! Fella is still my friend. Very close but not in the same school. But boleh la..kan JJ?..lol ;)

LOL!!! 4th! Raagavendra Ravee, my indian macha!! haha. He is gay, I tell you!! lol. Joking, my indian friend! lol!! Well, this fella ah..I tak tau nak cakap apo! lol. We're buddies now in form 5. We're super close! haha! The fella can crack something stupid up without faiL!! lol. The first time we met was in secondary school. In form 2!! PHANTOM OF DE OPERA!!!! *jeng jeng jeng jennngggg* lol. The amount of drama we received. lol. Terrible, I tell you! haha! The phantom was a success! lol. Seriously, the drama was crazy!! loll!~ And after that, we went to form 3..We aren't as close in form 3 than in form 2..'Cause we're in a different class. So, in form 3. . . . .

I met this girl. This girl with full of problem up her sleeves all de time..And that girl is Charlene Anne Lee..The PIG!!!!! lol! Actually, I met her in form 1 itself..But we're not close at all. Well, it seems that in form 3, she was in the same class as I am and I felt rather awkward around her the first few times. lol! And I ended up sitting beside her in class! Imagine that huh?..lol. I remember how we got close so very clearly. lol. It was during February test and she needed to talk to someone but no one was available to talk to. So, she turned to me, and she started talking about her love problems..lol..It was rather random of her to do so. And lol! I remember the end of that conversation, she was like, yeay!! I got someone new to talk to!! lol. Ever since then, she tells me everything. It took me a while to open up to her and it took her long enough to wait. lol! You should see the number of attempts she did! hahaha! Pig, pig, pig...lol!! Funny, according to her, if I didn't appear in her life, she would've be this ultimate bitch that can't control her emotions..Hmms, I always do wonder if it's true..But heck!! haha! I manage to calm the pig down! hehe! Down piggy!..DOWN!! lol! Jokinggsss! :D

These people had change my freaking life! haha. Without them, lol. God knows what happen. I truly and honestly, from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU!!! Thank you for good times, the bad and the unforgettables. Thank you all for everything, thank you for the moments we've shared, thank you for the arguments that made me stronger, thank you. Just, thank you..I really and honestly am thankful for the existence of you all..Charlene, Nick, Raaga, Mait, JJ and even the rest of my friends!! Saw, Navin, Ee Von, Kus Kus and all..Thank you..Thank you for everything...Thank you...

Another poem.

The Unspoken

I tried to be,
More than me,
But the outcome was,
All gone with the dust.

Walking down the lane,
I felt a huge pain,
At the corner of my heart,
There lies the poisonous dart.

Lying down on the floor,
Thinking what is my life for,
When I can't do anything right,
And being the one who always lose the fight.

No, I will not sleep,
When I am sinking this deep,
Deep into the depths of thoughts,
Thinking of the pain I have brought.

This one person you're now seeing,
Is indeed sinking very deep,
Sinking so deep until she could feel,
A breaking heart as if it was real.

I need you to just hold me tight,
And give an exact path to the light so bright.
Guide me to the truth among the lies,
And help me dry my tears from my cries...

Hmms.

As I sit here in the dark, I look around seeking for a spark. What is it that is missing from the heart of mine?..Have I done any crime to deserve this one painful fine?..Wait, it isn't painful or even joy, Maybe I am just a toy. No, definitely not. That was not what I was taught. This feeling I have in me, Maybe it's just something i can't see. What is it?..What is it?..What is it that I feel so missing, so empty and so...lost?...

The Moment Of Truth.

Well guys, this is it. This is the moment of truth. We are officially leaving our high school years in just a few days. We best make the best out of what we have left. To those who has something they want to do at the last moment of being a high school student, do it now, for we won't be turning back once we head to college. I know I am truly satisfied during my high school years. Those memories and moments will stay in my heart forever. That I can promise to everyone of you that I truly love and care. I am surprised how fast time flies. It feels like just yesterday I first met everyone in high school. Time flies so fast when you don't notice. How odd. lol. Anyways, yeah. We are leaving high school!! I am so excited that I am finally taking a step forward to the real world, where the sharks and killer whale set their den. I am all for challenges in the real world! Hit me baby!! YEAH!! lol.

Well, I for one, can't wait to go to college. I won't leave my friends behind of course. No matter how busy I will be, I will make sure I have time for them no matter what. Words can't put how thankful I am to be able to meet those bastards!! haha! Those bastards are my world, my life. And they will be, no matter where I go. Who knows, one of the days in the future, we will one day meet up somewhere in the streets of KL and say, "HEY!! you are Ho right?! Omg! How long has it been??.." I can so imagine..lol. Yeah, we are moving on and hell I'm not turning back for nuts! I am ready and I want to go through new experiences and the next trial of life! I'm ready! lol. I am very happy that we are finally going out of high school. We need the time to breathe and this is the time.

I will never forget those assholes that were there for me no matter what. lol, assholes. I really appreciate it. Pig, Von, Kus, Saw, Nick, Ga and everybody else, they are my friends and I am proud to say that they are!! lol. They are also my bastards, my idiots, my assholes and most of all, my friends!!! :D lol. I am really thankful for them and I will never forget them. I won't!!! Nope. lol. Slap me if I do. lol. Anyways, that is it for me. Till next post, ciao!

When A Digi Operator meets....me!!

LOL!!!!! Digi operators are super amusing!! lol. Here's the story. Today, I accidentally locked my phone SIM. So, I called up the Digi operator and the conversation goes like this.....

Beep....Beep....Beep....
Digi Operator : Hello, what may I help you?..
Me : Hi! I would like to retrieve my PUK number please. I accidentally locked my phone SIM.

Digi Operator : Okay. I will now confirm your phone number that is 016-*******. Is it correct miss?..
Me : Yeah!
Digi Operator : Okay miss. Can I please have your name?..
Me: Uhh..Elaine.
Digi Operator : Okay miss Elaine, may I know under who's name you number is registered?..
Me : Err..I think's it's under my aunty's name...

Yada, yada, yada...My first attempt went down the drain. So, I thought, I should just fake it. And haha! I did! It went like this....


Beep...Beep...Beep....
(a different operator answered)
Digi Operator : Hello. What may I help you?..
Fake aunty(me) : (sounding like a retard) Hello. My name is Miss Shim. Can I have my PUK number please?..I accidentally locked my phone SIM.
Digi Operator : Okay Miss Shim, can I confirm your number that is 016-*******. Is that correct?..
Fake aunty : Yeah.
Digi Operator : Okay miss. Can I have your I/C number please?..
Fake aunty : My I/C number?..Uhm...My I/C number....I..Don't remember. I got short term memory lost....
Digi Operator : Uhm..Okay. When is your birthday then?..
Fake aunty : Err...September....26th??....
Digi Operator : Uhm..No..Okay, where do you live?..
Fake aunty : I...Don't remember...But it's somewhere in Genting Klang!
Digi Operator : Okay...What plan you're using then?..
Fake aunty : What plan..Err..Friends &.....*pause*...What plan do you have?? Is it necassary to ask all of these?..
Digi Operator : Yes. In order to get the PUK number, you need your I/C number but since you don't remember....
Fake aunty : I'm sorry.
Digi Operator : It's okay. Do you have friends and family then?..
Fake aunty : Yeah!
Digi Operator : Okay, name me one of the numbers.
Fake aunty : Okay. 016-*******
Digi Operator : Okay miss. Your PUK number is bla bla bla bla..You best write it down because this is the same PUK number if say u need it again.
Fake aunty : Ok. I will.
Digi Operator : (Repeats the PUK number)
Fake aunty: *blurs*
Digi Operator : (Repeats again)
Fake aunty : Okay. Can you repeat it again?..I didn't catch it before that.
Digi Operator : (Repeats again in frustration)
Fake aunty : Ah! Thanks!
Digi Operator : Thank you for being a Digi customer, miss. Have a nice day. Bye
Fake aunty : Okay bye!

haha!! Amusing giler wei! stupid Digi operator..haha! But I was amazed by her patience though. Really cools. lol. Anyways, that's it from me! Ciaos!

A stroll down memory lane

You know, today, I realised that songs make a great deal in our life. Without music, there won't be any memory. Well, not as much. Today, I decided to transfer the old songs I used to hear into my laptop. I remember very clearly as the songs started playing one by one. My past that was a blur to me was made clear by the songs I used to hear. The same old songs that made me cry as well as smile. It's funny how time can go pass so fast and the past was just left forgotten without realisation. How odd. But I guess, it's for the better. As the songs were playing one by one, I remembered slowly what I went through last time and the moments I had and why is the song so special to me and all that. I remember it all. It was such a special moment for me right now. I feel so much emotions at once. And it's not in a bad way. The memories I'm having right now, the stroll down memory lane, was all forgotten until now. Ah. Music. Such a great treasure of life.

I also realised that time has passed for quite a long time. It's been a while since I first met my friends and it's been a while since I felt all awkward around them and all. It's been a while. Such great times I have to admit. The process of knowing them was really a great experience. I love them with all my heart. And yes, I agree with Nick and Raaga that we are somehow like a family. For some reason, it is true. Raaga made it clear to me today that we are always around for one another no matter where we are. And yes, we have been doing a bit of talking and it was a great one. The skies has never been more beautiful. Today was such a great day for me and I felt that everything is starting to fall back into place. I am happy that I finally see what Raaga truly is and also cause of a few things that had happened today. I feel very thankful and blessed for today in a way. Everything is falling into place and I hope it does the same to all of you too. :)

Anyways, that is it from me. Until next time, byes and take cares! ;)

the random posting.

This world works its magic in such an odd way. One minute a thing can seem so fine and the next, all effort is down the drain. Maybe this world has it's own reason on why things has to work in such a way. That is an answer we can never know, honestly. Some of you may know that friendship means a lot to me. I will do everything I can to make it all stable and fine. But sometimes, issues have to happen. For what?..I guess it is a test of patience and honesty. I mean, I may not have the power to make it all okay, but I do have the will power to at least try. It is never easy to deal with issues among friends. Trust me, it is never easy. I certainly wish it is easy but it is just not. We may think that one small problem is just a minor thing and is not to be concerned about, but, some people just love to make the situation so much worse than it has already is. This has got nothing to do with anyone. It was said in general. I guess, like Charlene said, there is no such thing as forgiving too much. We can forgive numerous of times and yet we do not say anything nor expecting anything in return. What is done, has been done. We cannot do anything about it. Regretting would just make everything worse.

I don't know why I wrote this but I just really want to. lol. I guess that's it for now. Adios, muchachos!

The Thoughts Of An Innocent.

Well, I've seen that love is such a tricky thing to deal with in life. I mean, its simply ridiculous that love tricks us all the time. Don't you think?..Yeah, so, it has been said that our mind and heart don't always stay on the same page. By that I mean, our heart don't feel the same as our minds think it would. It's all just a trick your mind and your heart do. But what if we manage to balance both our logic and emotion? Is that possible? Well, I certainly believe it is. Our mind works in such unexplained ways until it can trick the hearts of some. Like a good friend of mine once said, "some people has the mind that trick them on falling in love but they are actually not". The cheating heart. Hurm, sounds appropriate. Why do us humans have that little hole in our hearts that is waiting to be filled with the love of the other? Why?..This is something even I don't know. haha. Who does actually. They can say that they are a love-addict and some can say, the past took a piece of it and ran away with it. But I can say that it is all just an excuse. Everyone got their own opinion. Yeah, that one hole can change a person's life. Somehow, it does. Think about it.

That hole was made along with us by God for a reason. And it is a thing we shall not question about. We should be happy the way that we already are compared to those who has no one in their lives. So, what if we have no boyfriend or girlfriend? Do you think that it is important to have one? Maybe in the future, but not now. Now, it is better to just be friends with everyone you know. Friends is your water while family is your blood. Be thankful. I despise those who says that their life is a wreck just cause of something small. Okay, I might have say it once in a while. I think I did. haha. I mean, all that matters is your family and your friends. Who else is there besides God himself?..Well, tell me the answer when you find one. I may not be the right person to say things about these things because my family but I don't want the world to repeat the mistakes I did. (haha. like anyone is going to read my blog) Lol. This was written because I feel that it is something you all should know. Though, you all may already know but yeah, it is better to have another reminder. lol.

Anyways, that is all from me for tonight. Might be writing a poem later the morning. See yahs and may God bless yer souls. =)

...

It's 6.15 in the morning...And I'm still not asleep. This is rather idiotic.

The Orientation Detector

Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you, the orientation detector!! hahaha. Give it a spin.
Do you see the dancer turning clockwise or anti-clockwise? If she spins clockwise you are straight, if she spins anticlockwise you are a lesbian/gay and if you can get her to go in either direction you are bi.


http://lovegirls.co.uk/content/articles/rightbrainleftbraintest.gif
(I can't get the stupid picture to spin. Go to that URL to see.)


It's a test to see if you use the right side of your brain more than the left side. If clockwise, then you use more of the right side of the brain more and vice versa.

LEFT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses logic
detail oriented
facts rule
words and language
present and past
math and science
can comprehend
knowing
acknowledges
order/pattern perception
knows object name
reality based
forms strategies
practical
safe


RIGHT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses feeling
"big picture" oriented
imagination rules
symbols and images
present and future
philosophy & religion
can "get it" (i.e. meaning)
believes
appreciates
spatial perception
knows object function
fantasy based
presents possibilities
impetuous
risk taking

So which way does it spin for you? Are you tempted to reword the test meaning? Good luck!

p/s: Well, apparent I can make it turn both ways. hahaha! You should know what I mean by now. lol.

The Life Of The Typical.

Sometimes, things may look like the truth, but it can be a fake. We can be blinded by so many things, mainly, love. haha. How funny. Love, love, love...The ever so great feeling in the universe! But in between that thing called "love", there is so many things we, as a human must first face. Annoyingly, we did. We go through the trials and errors, pain, hurt, joy, memories and all sorts. Each has it's own fucked up moment. haha. As we drink the last drop of wine, we say to ourselves,"it's time to go back". Knowing whats going to happen, we all take our own sweet time to enjoy the little time we have. Thoughts of the typical says,"I hate my life and it sucks!" Yeah, it is indeed. The time that we get to be free is so limited. We laughed, we cried, we talked and we sighed. The life of a typical as we all cried. At her balcony we all stood, as we waste our night away.. As the wind blows and the rain falls, we all talk until it was dawn. When the sun rises, we all got up and say, "hey! it's such a beautiful day!" Yeah, beautiful it is to me. Looking far into the distance, we looked, wishing we all could fly from this place. A song for all of us that feel the same, we shall beat ourselves in our own game.

It's just me and my thoughts

Feels like a perfect time to just blog. Again. haha. So, I have been thinking again recently. Since when I don't?..lol. Anyways, I have been confused lately about certain matters. Well, at least I think I am. *scratches head* haha. My life have been weird and yet funny lately. Been happy for the past few days. I don't feel as empty as I was before for some reason. hahaha. I was probably goin' through PMS that time. I'm not so sure myself. It was all a blur. lol. I think my insomnia is getting worse. Cause I can't seem to sleep right now. It's 4.05am by the way. haha. Oh! And..Ocean's Thirdteen is nice! Its better than Ocean's Twelve anyways. Ocean's eleven was awesome too! loll. Apparent I had a movie marathon with myself. How sad. haha. :)

You know how exactly I feel right now? I feel that I need to just let some things go. For the better. Don't get me wrong but I don't have any grudge on anyone. lol. Just need to let go and cut people some slack and cut myself some slack too. It's reaching the end of the year and...I really don't want it to end but I need it too. Let me list out some reasons.

Reasons on why I NEED the year to end.

1. I need a brand new life
2. I want new experiences on the next level of life
3. Don't want to go through the same old thing again and again
4. I want to take the next step and march toward the next level
5. Get a taste of freedom
6. Learn what is the true meaning of independence
7. Learn self-control without any sort of help
8. Learn to count on myself
9. Get to know how to solve my own problems
10. Learn more thingsss!!~ =)

Reasons why I DON'T want the year to end

I dont really have a reason why. Just basically will miss my friends awfully...Though we can contact one another, it won't be the same. But hey, it's for a good cause right? ;)

I love moving on. It's the best way to experience. I love everything for what it is. I love how God had set up this life for me to determine my own destiny. The path I chose, the people I meet, the great, great times I had. It's all here. In my heart. A thing I never forget for the rest of my life. To all my friend out there, I can assure you that none of you will be forgotten. I cherish those are worth being cherish. Whether it is good or bad, I still just love them for who they are. =)

I guess thats it. lol. I love those have been there so much for me and I will forever will. =) Lots of love!~ Adios. ;)

Flattered. =D

My vision is blurring. haha. Well, the reason I decided to blog today is simply because I felt like it is a perfect time to write. Anyways, I feel very flattered today. Very much flattered, actually. You have no idea how good that feels. Not that I am flattered in a sense that I got a compliment, but in a sense that, I got to help people. For some reason, helping to me is a very, very happy thing to do. The smiles, the laughs, the joy, are all there. Not to mention, pain, rage and disappointment as well. I may just be the ears for them but, in a way, I am very much happy that I get to listen to them. I am very happy today and also rather tired. lol. It is clear to me that sleeping late isn't a good idea anymore. haha.

Yeah, I've been suffering a minor stage of insomnia lately. I have no idea why but I think its the stress or tension or something. lol. It seemed that way because I read this thingy that Ee Von sent and it was stated that way (and yes Von, its that same ebook that makes people fall aleep, as you call it. haha). That book tells me so much I need to know and haha, like what Ee Von said, it made people fall asleep and yes it did to me, again. haha. That ebook is interesting but somewhat boring. Honestly. loll. I think I won't be able to sleep again tonight. Oh well, desperate housewives then! haha.

I think that's it for today. I guess. haha. I don't think anyone will read it though. It's plain nonsense. haha. Ok folks, that's it. Ciaos and may God bless yerss~ =D

A glimps of me?

You know what I realised this past few days? I realised that nothing can break a bond of someone just by a mere argument. Nothing can't be done and if by means I will do anything to make it right. The only problem now is that, I know what to do but just refusing to do it. As evil as I may sound but, I too, can make my own choices. Being stepped on and back-stabbed was far enough for me. Too much can lead to nothing but pain. I have learnt that a few years back and yet I let it happen again. So much for bein' nice. We are all just human. We forgive and hopefully forgets. Well, apparently, I am a forgiver but ain't a person who can forget so easily. Who does? Mistakes were made so that a person can shape themselves into a better person, a perfect person. But how perfect can one get? I rest my case. No one is perfect. Indeed, no one. I may done some shit in the past but what I did was I tried to make it better or try fixing it even if it was putting the blame on myself. Yes, it took me a while to figure out. How pathetic.

A burden? Burden was not in my mind even once. Well, what come, comes. I am accepting how life is and suppose to be. There isn't any point for me to put myself down just cause someone decides to come into the picture and ruin everything. This is not directed to anyone. It was meant generally. I don't talk bull about people. Not anymore at least. What's the point of talking or venting about people when we, ourselves, can't do anything about it? It pretty dumb if you ask me. But what can I do about human nature of venting? haha. Nothing. Speaking of human nature, human, we, do things which are unexpected at times. If we can find a way to forgive the mistakes that people do, I can bet you, there won't be any problem. But again, human nature, they just want to get back at the other person cause of this one word, "revenge". Really! You got to trust me on this. Revenge, revenge, revenge! Oh! What's the point? Pleasure? Feeling good to make sure the other party gets what they deserve? Don't you think that you are the evil one doing all this nonsense just so you can feel ""pleasure""? It's ridiculous.

Gosh, I am talking so much today. haha. Anyways, yeah. Revenge isn't the answer to all problems. To any problems, in fact. Why hold the grudge of hating when you can build a new friendship? Why hate rather than love? Don't ask me. Ask yourself. I can bet not much people reads my blog but to those who does, I can bet you, at this very moment, you are loving someone, hating that one person or may be just simply confused at something. Well, forgive those who have hurt or is hurting you dearly, love those who hates you, love even more to those who loves you. Be a bigger person and let things go. Look at things at a brighter side of life. It may be boring and annoying but hey! You got people who you know that will be there for you. So, why worry? Let family paint your picture and friends as your background colour! As in for you...You'd be the artist. One who is constantly proud of that picture that was painted with such colorful colours and magnificent art, the one who is constantly smiling whenever you look at it, one who will never be ashamed of having that painting on your wall, even if it is hideous.

haha. This is unexpected. Really shocking if you ask me. Just feel so optimistic at this moment. I am lucky to have people who I dear and they are the ones who I feared too. haha. Anyways, This is it for me. So, take good care of yourselves and may God bless yerss!!~ =)

News Flash!

zomg!! Heroes season 2 is out!! Wheeee!!~ I have watched the first episode of season 2 and fuck!! It left me hanging! And and hehe! It was great! It was such a shocker what happen in the end of the episode. You should watch it!! Download at your nearest bitorent! loll.

Fucked!

Yes, I am back to my emo self. How surprising. Today is so bad and yet so fucked up funny. I have made a conclusion that, the ustazas in school are a bunch of horny and blue-minded people. Okays, the story was that...

Me and Von went to school together. I sent her to school. Well, we went to school and found out that our classes were freaking empty!! Okay, after trials. I didn't think of that. So, we hanged out for a while and decided to hang in my car, along with Nick. We practically spent the whole morning inside the car. Hahaha. Fuck. So, we were waiting for an opportunity to get out of school cause the damn guard didn't want to let us out. Giving a bunch of excuses as usual. So, we hanged out inside the car as if there isn't any life. I feel so dead inside the car..As the petrol burns, I get headache thinking of a way to get out of school. And, the fucked up thing is..I went to toilet with Von and went back knowing the 2-shey people was sorta damaging my car. More like disturbing, actually. Anyways, after that, we decided to have a game of dai dee. In the car. Omg, I tell you. The car is like a house or something just now. Moving on, we were playin' dai dee and suddenly a ustaza, wait, 2 ustazas, came by our car and ask what were we doin'. We were like, nothin' just listenin' to music. She gave a whole crap lecture about the time and shit like that. And she was like, what were we actually doin' here with guys and girls in the car. I was like wtf... Guys?? lol!!! There was only Nick. I guess the sitting position was a bit fucked ah. And she was like don't sit like that, I don't like the fact that there are guy and girls in one car. I was like....Fuckkk..You hornay ass! What can we do..Damn..They are so blue-minded. I think they haven't get laid for a long time or something!! Grrs..

The day ended with a fucked up feelin' we all have. I hope it'll go away soon.

Wasted.

Today is such a waste of fucking time in school. Time gone just like that. Such a waste!!!

Pinky, I am!

You Are a Pinky

You are fiercely independent, and possibly downright weird. A great communicator, you can get along with almost anyone. You are kind and sympathetic. You support all your friends - and love them for who they are. You get along well with: The Ring Finger Stay away from: The Thumb

What Finger Are You?

All we need is friendship

When you feel like you're falling or whenever your wings are about to break, all you need is a friend. Friendship isn't something we should take for granted. Whenever hardship comes around, we can always count a friend or two for a feel good time. I've realised this long time ago but, it hit me again yesterday during the party. My last post was about the emo party we had and yeah..All we needed was each other to make the night a blast. It wasn't any fancy party or anything but just a normal one, to just hang out. All we need was friends. After all of us went our separate ways back home, all of us went back to the same ol' gloomy self again. You see my point?..Friends are as important as family to some of us. And yes I admit, I am more to my friends than I am to my family. That is cause I have my own reasons. Anyways, friends are angels in disguise. They lift us up whenever we are down, make it all better with those words that one is waiting to hear or just plain bein' there.

Some people may not see the way I do but yeah, friends to me are more than anything I need. With them, I am able to do anything or just be myself. I may fake myself once in a while but, around friends whom I trust, you will find me and myself just plain ol' making a fool outta myself. lol. I hate faking a person who I am not. But sometimes, I guess its for the better. Friendship is pure and everyone needs a friend to make their day a bit less stress. Weather it is just bein' there for them or just making silly moments happen, it helps more than you can think of. Maybe some people will say, no, it didn't really helped me, but know this, it did. They are just letting stuff get pass the fact that they are feeling better. I know it very well myself cause I have done it before.

Yesterday was a disaster for me. Morning was fine but when the school bell rings, that is when my nightmare starts. I went back home pissed off cause of some things. I broke my file cause of it. It was really like raging fire in my eyes. I came up and just broke down. Crying and crying and crying..For almost an hour. And when night falls, it was the party. I had fun there. It made me feel a whole lot better until my parents started the whole coming back thing. Got emoed and nearly broke down and von's place thinking that this day could not get any worse. But it did. lol. Came back home and got scolded. Came in the room and started crying again. I'm so sorry to those who was worried. Saw, Navin, Lene, Von and Cat. Basically everyone was worried. I felt so much better after talking to Lene and Von online. They made it all better. That is when I realised that I still have them no matter whatever happens. Not that I haven't before but this time, I am confirming that I will. All I needed was just friends to make it all better. I thank them so so much. And I love them so much for bein' there for me. You have no freaking idea how thankful I was. lol =D

Anyways, that's all for now. Now, I know I am never alone cause I can always count on my friends for a good time or just plain bein' there. No matter who you are, you know who you are. And I certainly do...I love you all so much. Never forget that. ;p until next time!~ Byes and may God bless yers.

Here are some pictures from last nite.

Emos yang tak lakuuu!! loll!~


Yiaksss~ haha.


Cheers for the drunks!! lol..


The drunk pimp!! hahaha.


Now, this is what I call..Emoooess...hahaha!!

Emo Fiesta!!

By looking at the title you must be wondering why I said that. Well, yesterday von, lene and myself decided to have a mooncake festival party at von's place. Just a small one. With drinks. =D Well, it seems that the people which was there at the party, was mostly people who are emo and really needed to get drunk or high. haha. Well, it sorta worked. Most them were high. haha. In a way, all of us got what we actually went there for. hahaha. MOONCAKE FESTIVAL CELEBRATION!!! lol. Rightt onn!~ Bull shit! lol. Well, for starters, our host was fucked up drunk. And her guest were all tipsy or high. haha. But I couldn't get myself high nor tipsy even though I needed to so bad. Driver kot!! Fuck..I don't fucking care!! The next time, I'm making them to drive!! lol. Instead, I got emo till you couldn't imagine. haha. Came back at 12 sharp and got fucking scolded, which didn't make my night any better. Broke down like some asshole in my room. Got emo and started talking crap to saw and lene online. My apologies. Oh well, so much for this party. It worked for a while and fuck! It made me feel so much better, while it lasted. haha. At least, I guess. lol. haha. I think the amount of brain cells we killed yesterday was more than enough to erase our pain. For that moment, at least. You gotta agree with me man. lol. Well, von, thanks again for your party. It was awesome! I needed that like seriously. haha. And thanks to those who comforted me when I was emoing last night. Really. I thank you. I love you guys so much!! Thanks. By the way, Pig and Von, you made me feel so much better. Thanks for bein' there. Anyways, that is all for now. 'Till next time. Ciaoz!~

Poem..

The Forgotten Angel

I can't explain the emotion in me,
It is something even I cannot see.
The pieces don't fit anymore,
Then what I am doing here for?

Falling away to my fantasy,
A place where there isn't any reality.
Somewhere where I can be who I am,
Some place which isn't so damned.

Though alone I stand,
I try the best I can.
To turn my emotions inside out,
So that I can live without any doubt.

Day by day I struggle,
To make my wings unfurl.
Happy may I seem,
But my light is slowly dimmed.

My wings is nothing but broken,
Leaving me here to burn.
Bleeding and bleeding was my wings and I,
I guess this is time for my goodbye.

Depart I shall,
For you have done well.
To make me feel all small,
And rejecting all my desperate calls.

Leave me now and let me be,
Leave me alone until someone sees.
I am the forgotten angel in the dark,
That has a unforgettable mark.

Let me go if that is for the best,
I guess I have always been a pest.
I fail in your eyes all the time,
I guess that was my greatest crime.

I am nothing in the eyes of yours,
And this scar of mine will not cure.
For the forgotten angel has unfurl her wings,
And is ready to be forgotten by everything she brings.

Joy in your eyes,
Pain in my sight.
Kill me once again,
To me whole again.

Another one. =)

Music Of The Night

One very beautiful night,
Stood a girl under the spotlight.
It was a performance to remember,
A night that will last all Decembers.

Looking at the crowd was she,
Looking far away so she could see,
The brightest star among the skies,
Under that one spotlight.

The stage was under the lights of the moon,
And the performance will start soon.
With the crowds applause and critics,
It is a night to remember indeed.

On the stage where she stands,
Was accompanied by a band.
She was ready and so are they,
To make that night into the greatest of day!

She sang with the most beautiful voice,
Standing on the stage with her elegant poise.
She has brought the whole house down with her words,
Bringing it out of this world.

Wearing a dark blue dress she did,
And it was a perfect fit.
She had sang with all her might,
And made it the music of the night.

The crowd was amazed,
With a very shocked face.
The audience applauded non-stop,
And that moment was indeed caught.

It was time for her to make an exit,
Knowing that dreams do exist.
Her dreams has come true,
Under the night skies so blue.

The imagination speaks.

Walking endlessly. I can feel and hear the wind whispering but all I did was just walk and kept walking. Stomping through all that's in my way, I walked. I hear screams, laughs and all that's not matter. This desert has been a journey of unknown for some. But not me. Definitely not me. I walked across this cold and dark valley of the unknown journey that people spoke of. Cries! Cries! Cries. I hear unspeakable things. Things which are unexplained by humankind nor anyone. Ghosts. I hear their pain, their rage. Oh, the sorrow of life. No one can see them. No one...Not even me. These ghosts live in the souls of human as the feed to our anger, pain, jealousy, fear and guilt. They eat us up slowly, so slowly...until one day we cannot take it and just fade into the bottomless pits of hell where all flame and fire of the darkness burns your flesh and mercily leaving you to die in pain.

Left the valley of emptiness I did and head towards the next town. I found the town that was named after me some time ago. Remembering those glory days I realised, I single handedly kill the town myself. My pride, my victory..Gone. Just like that. Victory may have fall upon the town but I have let my pride get to my head. The victory made my ego high up. Didn't bother to guard, to protect the town, I left it as it was thinking I could kill all bandits that comes in the way. Yes, I could. Could. I left it unprotected. One day, someone came to town. They were not humans nor animals..more like beasts with fangs. They came and ate the villagers. My friends! My family...My dearly loved one...All lost because of my foolish act. Pool of blood, tears of anger and tears of hate...All pointed their fingers at me leaving me feeling small...I left the town with such shame and my ever useless ego..

Yes, leaving the town of loneliness I did..Now, having nothing, I walked across this desert of misery. With no heart in me or emotions, just me and my cold, cold heart. This anger! This rage...This pain..This guilt..What is there left?..What is there?.. In this pit of raging fire, I fall..My flesh is burning..The horror..The darkness..So dark but yet...so bright..Helplessly, I fall deep. Deep, deep inside. Until the flames of hell burn the remaining of me..Leaving me nothing but the ashes of the uncared........

Poems, poems and more poemsss!!!~ =)

A New Day

Under the moonlight she stood,
Alone on that floor without her mood.
Standing below the streetlight she glanced,
Glance to that pearly floor she once danced.

Wearing nothing but her black dress and heels,
She began to brake down as she kneel.
Having flash backs on the used to be,
Remembering moments that was stored in her memory.

Crying and crying was what she kept doing,
Until she refuse to feel anything.
Feeling emotionless as she walked across the pavement,
Trying to deny everything she has learn.

Along the pavement she saw,
A rose so beautiful but with a bit of flaw.
The flower was very pretty,
But had grown on a ground so empty.

She picked it up and looked closer,
And she began to think that it does not matter.
No matter how alone can one be,
One day someone will be able to see.

As the night ended with the rise of the sun,
She realised a new journey has just begun.
With that rose in her hand, she walked away,
Leaving fantasy behind and start a new day.

My daemon?..

Life = Love = Dots.

Sometimes, the world revolves you in a very complicated or shall I say, painful ways. At times, we fall and at times we rise. There will always be ups and downs no matter where we are. Life is born that way and we can do nothing about it but to live with it. Feeling life is unfair? Yes. I indeed agree. Nothing is fair in this life. Nothing. All we can do is to believe in ourselves and try to move on. I always do call life as the 'sine' graph, where the graph goes up and down at a constant value. (a bit addmaths term there, but what the heck! haha) Learn from mistake and you will be a whole new person. Trust me on this. ;)

Life has brought us joy and pain as well. It has filled our life with full of emotions. Love, happiness, joy, sadness, anger, jealousy, fear, innocence and also honesty. The wind bring us to where we want to go. All we need is just a little faith and hope. A little is more than enough. Sometimes, it is better to look things at a different way. Selfish acts will cause nothing but tragedy. Forgive. Forget. It may not be easy as it was said but nothing can be done if no one tried.

Love is a very common thing now and are always mentioned. I admit. Love is an unexplained feeling. That is a definite. People may wonder, how do you know you are in love with somebody? Well, from what I see it, you can't tell whether one is in love. We can never tell. It is a feeling that is felt straight from the heart and straight from the souls of humans. You just know?..Nope. You don't just know, you feel as if your worries was left behind you, you feel as if you are floating on air even if you are not, you feel. . . wow. I guess love gives us a feeling of satisfaction and security.

As much as I want to say I am in love, but I am not. haha. And yet I am writing about this. Well, it is just my experience about love. My point of view on things. It may not be true but that is the way I think about it. Love can be shown in numerous ways. Through family, friends or even through our partners. Love is a very beautiful thing and yet very painful. Nothing is perfect. There is a cons in everything of life. I admit that I have never been in love before but seeing those who are, is just simply amazing. Leaving worries behind them and only present for that moment to cherish. Isn't it amazing how love makes one feels? haha. It's beyond anything in the world if you ask me.

Love is sweet,
Love is kind.
Love is never selfish,
And so is mine.

Just felt like doing that. lol. Anyways, this is it from me. Hope to blog again soon. haha. I don't think I will be blogging anytime soon because of my trials exams. I wish all the best and may God bless all of you. Have a great time. See yahs.

Etc etc etc

Garh! I really hate internet. I typed a post, no wait, two posts actually, last night. The first post was accidentally deleted because I accidentally backspaced it. I am such a klutz. The second one, however, got deleted because my internet got cut and I didn't freaking know!! Anyways, I am not freaking retyping everything that I wrote. It was freaking long. I will just have to try to summarise it. Well, the first post was something about me being depressed and all sort. Something like that. I don't want to retype that again. It's too depressing to think about it.

My second post however, was about this site I got from a friend of mine. This particular site is called postsecret.com. This site is such an awesome site. Seriously. You have to check it out for yourself. It's super cool! Well, most of you would know of the music video 'Dirty Little Secrets' by The All-American Rejects. Well, this site is more or less the same as the music video where people were asked to write down their dirty little secret. What is cool is that this little project was started 2 years ago by this one guy (i don't know his name). Apparently, it is legal in America. Everyday, there are postcards that were sent to him from people all over America.

How does it work, you might wonder. Well, they send a postcard containing their secrets to postsecret through mail and he post it in the postsecret blog which is known worldwide (maybe I am exaggerating a bit). The secrets is then posted in the postsecret blog which will be updated every Sunday erasing the previous posts. That is why they call it 'PostSecrets: Sunday Secrets'. Different secrets will be publish every week and the sender of each secret are classified. This site has made me realise that everyone has their own dirty little secret. It sort of made me think of my own secret that I have. Swt.

There is one part which the site stated that "there is two types of secrets. secrets you hide from people and secrets you hide from yourself". I very much agree with that statement. Secrets we hide from ourselves are secrets we don't want to admit. In other words, we are under denial. Don't you think so?..Well, I do. Everyone has their own secret. I have mine, my friends has theirs, my family has and as well as everyone in the entire world. If you think you don't have anything to hide, think again. Everyone has one.

Sometimes, you might think, "I don't love him/her anymore" or "I am finally taking the step" or even "I am not missing what I left behind" but if you really give it a thought, you would have a total different reaction. Secrets, as I say. Secrets we hide from ourselves are such thoughts. I sort of pulled love into the picture didn't I? lol. Love is such a good example for everything. ;p Sorry if this is a screw up for some. This is such an interesting site! lol. If I talk more about it, I think I would be elaborating the topic and some other topic comes in. Example, love, like earlier.

Anyways if any of you are interested to check this site out, feel free to go to the link given below.

www.postscecret.blogspot.com

Go to that site!! It is really interesting!!! Trust me on this. You can not trust me on homeworks, giving information and all sort but this you got to believe! lol. Anyways I think that is all for now. Adios and may God bless yerss~ =)

Blogthingsss~~

People Envy Your Compassion

You have a kind heart and an unusual empathy for all living creatures. You tend to absorb others' happiness and pain. People envy your compassion, and more importantly, the connections it helps you build. And compassionate as you are, you feel for them.

What Do People Envy About You?

Your Personality Is

Idealist (NF) You are a passionate, caring, and unique person. You are good at expressing yourself and sharing your ideals. You are the most compassionate of all types and connect with others easily. Your heart tends to rule you. You can't make decisions without considering feelings. You seek out other empathetic people to befriend. Truth and authenticity matters in your friendships. In love, you give everything you have to relationships. You fall in love easily. At work, you crave personal expression and meaning in your career. With others, you communicate well. You can spend all night talking with someone. As far as your looks go, you've likely taken the time to develop your own personal style. On weekends, you like to be with others. Charity work is also a favorite pastime of yours.

The Three Question Personality Test

Enviromental Influence!!

Ta-dah! Back with a brand new happenings. The lastest happening thing is that people has been facing certain 'things' in school and out. It is so scary and I get freaked out by these things. Swt. I don't know whether I am paranoid or am it's true but I have been hearing things myself. I think I am paranoid. hahaha. Anyways, I blame it on the development of this damn country!! I mean it is good in a sense that it is developing but then, cutting down trees and killing our Oxygen source? Not cool man. We can die! Malaysia's population is increasing by the year. Aih, I've got no say.

Anyways, it is the month of July and soon August. How fast time pass by. SPM is getting near. I am already in critical condition. I am under pressure. Life is definitely not getting easier. Well, I need to learn to cope with it. These days have been awfully bad. It is really bad. I've gotten stronger from it. I think. lol. I really didn't expect everything to fall on me right now. I have an exam to face plus these things are falling on place. This sucks.

I've gotten my lisence for driving and heck! I am happy about it! I can bang those who offend me!! wahahahaa~lol. I would be sent to jail if I do that. I've been driving for quite sometime already. I am still a noob. A serious noob. hahaha. I am slowly mastering it. Hopefully I can master it all soon. haha. Klah. Thats it for now, til next time see yahs. Take cares and may God bless yerss!~ =)

SUCCESSS!!

So, today was SMKTM's Carnival Day. We as a group decided to open a stall for our Arts Club. It is sort of last minute but, haha, it is worth it. =) We decided on selling chocolate/honey popcorn and jelly as food and cincau, syrup, rootbeer float and tropical punch as drinks. The chocolate popcorn was a BIG HIT!! And also the tropical punch! It was a big big hit!! Unfortunately, the ice-cream for the float was melted so we couldn't sell much. But we did the best we could!! =) Everything went well. We spent about 70 maximum for the supply and we got 100 over profit. Not bad. It is considered as really good already, despite on the price we set. lol.

So, we started the day with Mika's album playing on pig's radio. hahaha. Mika made the day too! His songs is simply amazing. hahaha. So, after the song was on, our stall was officially opened!! hahaha. Funny ain't it? Anyways, as the hours went past, it was already 11am. We started at 8am. How time flies. lol. We have fun todayyy!! We even had fun cleaning the stall! hahaha. That is odd because we normally argue about something when it comes to cleaning. hahaha. Today was a no arguing/fighting day apparently. hahaha. We didn't argue but instead we worked together. Which is a really good thing. Haven't had that in ages. hahaha. =p Raaga is such a stupid promoter! hahaha. He promote like don't know what! Force people only. lol! Salam helped a lot today! Fella promote our stall like hell. Going around the school asking people to come~! hahaha. We're so blessed. hahaha. Blessed with a promoter!! loll~

Who knew opening our own stall could be fun? It was indeed a wise idea to open the stall. A really good one. lol. THANKS PIG!! hahaha. President of Arts Club for the ever so great suggestion!~ lol. =) I, as secretary of Arts Club, representing the Club to thank those who helped with today's successful sale. We appreciate it a whole lot! Thanks!~ Today's sale was a success. And where the cash go? lol. You will soon to find out. hahaha. Well, that is it from me, today made me all tired. hahaha. So, I'll see you all soon. See yahs, take care all and may God bless your soul~ =)

Yeayness~ =)

So, Today was Nick's birthday and heck! It was A BLAST!! lol. Me and pig planned whether to have it in the morning or during recess and we ended up having it in the morning. lol. So, I went to school really early today and brought the cake with me. wahahaha~ It was cappuccino. It taste pretty nice. =) I went to school freakingly early just to hide the cake somewhere. hahaha. Thank god by the time I reach school he ain't there yet. My prayers was answered! Thank God~ =) So, I was the earliest amongst the 3. (why am I not surprised again? lol) Well, it went pretty well, he came late and the cake was hidden. heeeeheeee~ Raaga, my ever so stupid buddy, came 5 minutes after me. hahaha. I was like, woooow, I haven't come to school this early in ages! hahaha.

Nick reached at about 7.10am. lol. And he didn't expect a thing. hahaha. I was waiting for pig to come. She reached at 7.15am. lol. After she came, she pass the present to nick and she asked where is the uh hum..lol. Walked to canteen fridge, took out a plastic with box in it. And it is the cake! Fuahahahaha~ hehe The best part is, he didn't expect it. hahaha. =p He expected lunch after school and all. lol. Cool cool. We did a great job! Go gang! hahahaha. After school, went to pig's place. Because had birthday lunch with birthday boi. lol. Hanged out with him and pig. Felt stupid the whole day. hahaha. I was kind of stupid the whole day. lol. =) We went around Ampang point looking for things for the carnival that is going on this Saturday. Since I am talking about it I shall promote.

COME!! COME!! COME TO OUR STALL!! BE THE CUSTOMERS OF OUR
EVER SO REFRESHING STALL!! WE ARE THE ARTS CLUB IN ACTION AND READY TO
BE AT YOUR SERVICE. PLEASE COME TO OUR STALL AND PURCHASE OUR FOOD AND DRINKS!
WE WILL BE SERVING DELICIOUS DRINKS THAT COOLS YOU AND FOOD THAT ENERGIZES YOU.
DON'T FORGET TO COME!! WE HAVE EVERYTHING YOU WANT!! COME!!

lol. Promotion. hahaha. This saturday is the carnival day. Everyone is invited! Come!! The more the merrier!! Don't forget to come to our stall!!!~ ARTS CLUB STALL!!!! Don't forget!!! lol. Anyways, this is it from me and I hope you all get to come to the carnival. Have fun and may God bless you all! =) And once again, HAPPY BIRTHDAY NICHOLAS, MY DEAR!! Don't ever forget these lovely friends of yours!! lol~ I'm out.

~::LaiNe Hoz::~

Thinking Of......?

I haven't been a frequent blogger like I first created this blog, huh? lol. I've been lazy to blog. Sorry for those who looks forward to my blog. Anyways, Things has been going fine lately, but it also has its own cons. What is life without pros and cons? A lifeless one. lol. =) Well, I've been thinking a lot lately and I couldn't help but to think about what the future have for in store for me. With my ever so bad results, I don't think I can go anywhere. I can't wait for my room to be done! Then only I can finally study properly.

Well, the future. I know I want to take up psychology as my course but I don't know if that is wise. I don't think it is though. Ah, what the heck. Well, been depressed a lot lately too. (Since when I am not? lol.) Been thinking a lot and moreover I have shit up my ass too. Lol. That is such a weird term. haha.

You know, I hate being right all the time. I mean at times it is fun to be right but you will reach a point where you just don't want to be right anymore. It feels like a curse. For example, I was right when I thought Charlene is most probably migrating to Australia even before she tells me about it. I already knew when I was back in form 3. Next, I knew people will use me for their own purposes. I was right. Next, I knew my family is bound to be broken. I was right. Next, I knew people I dear will leave me for personal reasons. And again, I was right. I hate being right all the time. Like I said earlier, it feels like a curse but also a gift. I guess I should be thankful.

Friends. I love them with all my heart. I do. But sometimes, I need more than just friends, I need someone I could count on no matter where they are or what they are doing. In other words, a boyfriend. At times I feel helpless without someone close. Like now, for example. This is one of the times I need someone just to melt my heart unintentionally. I feel so helpless now. And at time, I feel there is no need to have a guy in life for now. It is very confusing if you ask me. This is weird topic for me. I am always those "I don't give a shit" type. But you know, sometimes, people needs to be loved too.

Dreams. I had so many dreams about me falling in love. And it feels so so good. It feels as if you you are floating. With that warm hugs and kisses that wipe your fears away. Not caring about everything in the world but ourselves. It sucks to know it is just a dream. You woke up happy but when it hits you, it is just another lame ass dream. Lol. It sucks to know.

Ain't this unusual? For me to say all this? I find it weird. lol. Anyways, that's more than enough to last a week. hahaha. Till next time. See yahs, and may God bless you all. =)

Hurms..

Lol. I am back and with a new entry. So, I was in the whole lovey dovey mood since yesterday. I so hope it is a good thing. So so hope. hahaha. Well, apparently I am kind of worried at the moment. It seems that both Pig's phone are not getting through and I am afraid that something might have happened to her. Let's hope that didn't happen. I seriously hope and pray so. =S Well, I haven't been an active blogger. I didn't really have anything to blog about. Every time I do, something comes up and I can't blog. lol. (Not blaming anyone~)Well, I wrote another poem just now. Was in the zone again. =p Here it is. It is entitled 'Love'. Enjoys!~ =)


Love

Love is something unexplained,
Something we always retain,
And something we never get ashamed.

Love is a drive to show,
Show what we are loved for,
And to opened up a tightly shut door.

Love is very delicate,
It can never be explained by words,
Nor can we get by growing from dirt.

Love consist of trust,
It is not a way to find lust,
And understanding is a must.

Love is something very unique,
It will make us feel happy indeed,
And it will come to us in times of need.

Love comes along with pain,
There nothing cannot be done without a gain.
And then only sun will be seen from the heavy rain.

Love is hard to predict,
It will only cause bad conflict,
If we underestimate it.

Love is a very special gift,
It gives us a lift,
To go through the thick mist.

Love is here and always,
It can shown in so many different ways,
It is always here to calm the ever so rough days.

Love will never fade,
It does not have an expiry date,
It is meant to be here and that is how it was made.

BURFDAY WISHIESS!!~

The June babies!! lol. So far there is 4 in my list! And then rest is the soon to comes. lol. So, happy birthday and belated to....

1) Vivian Ho!! (sishta) - June 2nd
2) Aunty Patricia!! (Pig's mummy!) - June 2nd
3) Y.C!! (daddy's colleague~) - June 2nd
4) Crystal Tan!!! (MUMMYY!!) (today) - June 6th

And soon to come are
1) Stephanie!! - June 11th
2) Maitthreyan!! - June 26th

Three cheers for the June babies!! HAPPY BIRTHDAYS!!! =)

Omg..Boredomness!!

So, I've been stuck online for quite sometime and damn it, it is hell borink! Thank goodness for tuition later! (Yeay! Seeing Pig again after a week! lol) I feel as if I am decaying in front of the desktop! lol. Yeays! Getting my lappy back from Pig today! Haven't touch it for a week! Missed it so much. hahaha. Well, letting pig hang on to my lappy during my trip at Redang was indeed a good idea! lol. Since she misses her hubby so much and my lappy has a built in webbie cam, it helps them! LOL! I feel like a cupid!~ hahaha. William seemed very happy too! Chatted with him for 10second last night! lol. He was busy chatting with Pig last night. hahaha. What can I say? They simply love each other. hahaha.

I realise last night that love can indeed make a person do very crazy things. No matter how sick is one person or in a god damn bad mood, talking to your loved ones kind of just made it all alright. This is weird but it is such a beautiful magic. Don't you agree? I certainly do. lol. I love seeing people in very sweet relationships. They are just so sweet and happy and to them, nothing in the world matter. It is only them in their own world. So sweet~ Ahhhhh~ lol. Normally, I would find people who see people in relationships, jealous. I seriously don't know what is there to be jealous about. It is such a beautiful thing and I love to watch them holding hands and all sorts. hahaha. I guess I am weird. hahaha.

You all might have already know, my blog is full of damn blogthings. hahaha. That is what I call, 'Action Of Boredom'. lol. You have no idea how bored was I last night. hahaha. Luckily had Nick and Pig online. I get to chat with them till 1.30am. lol. So late. hahaha. Lol. That is it for today I guess. Lol. YEAY! Tomorrow going ballin' with Pig! And her cousin. XD lol. Anyways, that's it. Until next time, see yahs and may God bless you all~ =)

What Kind of Friend Are You?

You Are A Good Friend

You're always willing to listen Or lend a shoulder to cry on You're there through thick and thin Many people consider you their "best friend"!

What Kind of Friend Are You?

What Alcoholic Drink Are You?

You Are Beer!

You don't need to get totally wasted when you hit the bars. More of a social drinker, you just like to have fun with your friends. And as long as the beer keeps flowing, you're a happy camper. But don't mix things up: "Beer Before Liquor, Never Been Sicker!"

What Alcoholic Drink Are You?

What Makes You a Good Friend?

You Are a Good Friend Because You're Loyal

You stick with your friends no matter what, even if you feel like they're doing the wrong thing. You believe in letting people figure out their own path in life. It's not your place to interfere. And part of your loyalty means that you'll do a lot for your friends. You definitely go the extra mile. You'll even do great things for friends without them asking. After all, that's what friendship is all about. You are truly a friend for life. And you have friends you've known since you were a kid. Your friends can count on you to do a favor, remember a birthday, or just be there to listen. Your friends need you most when: They can't turn to anyone else You really can't be friends with: Fickle people who change friends quickly Your friendship quote: "Friendship doubles your joys, and divides your sorrows."

What Makes You a Good Friend?

What Kind of Drinking Woman Are You?

LOL!!! Check this outs!

You Are a a Martini Woman

Truly classy and refined, you drink like a lady. You know how to hold your liquor, and you always keep your composure. And you demand the same in a guy - especially if he can remain a gentleman while drunk. You prefer to date successful men, who can pay for your quality drinks.

What Kind of Drinking Woman Are You?

Randomness..

Yipee! I have found out how to style my hair!! try this.


-Before-


-After-


Lol. I don't know if I look good but hahaha. What the heck! hehe. =)

Never translate IT terms to the Malay Language

LOL!! Check this shit out! hahahaha

Just FYI...
Advice from Malaysia...

Never translate IT terms to the Malay Language

Why did Dr. Mahathir insist on using English for math and science? Because globally people use the language as information and/or technology language at this moment. How dangerous it is if we were to use these words in Bahasa, especially in schools. See example below.

> >>hardware = barangkeras
> >>software = baranglembut
> >>joystick = batang gembira
> >>plug and play = cucuk dan main
> >>port = lubang
> >>server = pelayan
> >>client = pelanggan

Try to translate this:
ENGLISH :
"That server gives a plug and play service to the clients using either hardware or software joystick. The joystick goes into the port of the client."

BAHASA :
"Pelayan itu memberi pelanggannya layanan cucuk dan main dengan menggunakan batang
gembira jenis keras atau lembut. Batang gembira itu dimasukkan ke dalam lubang pelanggan."

Now You Know.... How terrible is it!!!!!

What Kind Of Intellingence Do I have.

lol. check this out.

Your Dominant Intelligence is Interpersonal Intelligence

You shine in your ability to realate to and understand others. Good at seeing others' points of view, you get how people think and feel. You have an uncanny ability to sense true feelings, intentions, and motivations. A natural born leader, you are great at teaching and mediating conflict. You would make a good counselor, salesperson, politician, or business person.

What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

Me, Myself and I...

[x] Whats your name? Ho Koon Yee
[x] How old? 17
[x] Siblings? 1
[x] Their ages: 19
[x] Female or male: female
[x] Birthday: 5th May
[x] Nationality: Malaysian
[x] Birthplace: Kuala Lumpur
[x] Living in: Wangsa Melawati, Setapak.
[x] Eye color: Dark brown
[x] Hair color: Dark brown
[x] Righty or Lefty: Righty
[x] Zodiac Sign: Taurus
[x] Innie or Outtie: Outtie
[x] I daydream about: Past experiences
[x] Short or tall: Moderate
[x] School: Melawati High

[[-----------------DESCRIBE------------------>
[x] The shoes you wore today: None. Haven't set foot out of the door today.
[x] Your height: 160cm
[x] Your fears: Loosing my the people I love.

[[-----------------WHAT IS------------------>
[x] Your most overused phrase: 'hahahaha'. hahaha. ;)
[x] Your thoughts when you first wake up: What did I dream? lol.
[x] The first feature you notice in the opposite sex: Personality and Appearance
[x] Your best physical feature: Hurms, I don't know. You be the judge.
[x] Your bedtime: Normally around 12am. hahaha.
[x] Your most missed memory: Hurm, the times when I was so damn fucking carefree. hahaha.


[[-----------------YOU PREFER------------------>
[x] Pepsi or Coke: None actually. Prefer juice.
[x] McDonald's or Burger King: McDonald's!!
[x] Single or group dates: Single but don't mind group date as well.
[x] Cappuccino or Coffee: Cappuccino
[x] Tennis shoes or flip flops: Flip flops! Love erms! ;)
[x] Sports or mall: Sports I guess. I hate shopping. hahaha.

[[-----------------DO YOU------------------>
[x] Smoke: No
[x] Cuss: Lol. Definately. ;)
[x] Take a shower everyday: YEAH!! Of course! I would die if didn't. lol.
[x] Do you think you've been in love?: Erm, I guess so. lol. Don't know for sure. =p
[x] Want to go to college: Yeah. Anything new is good. But I will really miss the old times.
[x] Want to get married: Yeah, why not.
[x] Lie: Hahaha! No!! I don't!!
[x] Given someone a bath: Haha! Yeah! My baby cousin! =p
[x] Cry during a flick: YES!!

[[-----------------WOULD YOU------------------>
[x] Skinny dip: Hahaha. Why would I?
[x] Cut your own hair: NO!! Crazy arh?
[x] Stalk anyone: I did. Once. I think. hahaha.
[x] Skipped school: HAHAHAHAHHA!! What you think?.. ;)
[x] Hook up w/ a friend: Nah. I'd rather not.
[x] Eat shit for a million dollars: LOL!! I would actually consider. hahaha!

[[------------IN THE PAST MONTH DID:/:HAVE YOU-------------->
[x] Go to the mall: Yeah! lol.
[x] Eaten sushi: Nope. Hate it.
[x] Been on stage: No. I want to! But no. hahaha.
[x] Made homemade cookies: Lol. Don't know how.
[x] Been in love: Hahaha. No. Over it already. hehe.
[x] Dyed your hair: Nopes.
[x] Stolen anything: Nopes.

[[--------------HAVE YOU EVER------------------>
[x] Flown on a plane: No but I want to!
[x] Missed school because it was raining?: Hahaha. Yeah.
[x] Told a guy/girl that you liked them?: Nope. I kept it and I am glad I did. ;)
[x] Cried during a Movie?: Yes!! hahaha.
[x] Ever thought an animated character was hot?: Hurms, yeahhh..ahhh~ hahaha.
[x] Had an imaginary friend: Hahaha. No.
[x] Cut your hair: Yes I have.
[x] Had crush on a teacher?: LOL! NOOO!! crazy is it.
[x] Played a game that required removal of clothing?: Lol. Nah.
[x] Been caught doin "sumthin”?: Lol. I don't have anyone to do "something" with so no! haahha.
[x] Been called a tease?: Haha. No.
[x] Shoplifted?: Lol. Guilty? =p

[-----------------------OPPOSITE SEX-------------------------->
[x] Notice first? Personality and Appearance.
[x] have a boyfriend? Nopes!
[x] What are you into? It depends.
[x]Feelin anyone? Nah! Not at the moment.
[x] Ever rejected sumone? Yeah. hahaha.
[x] How many people of the opposite sex is in your buddy list? Too much. hahaha.
[x] Ever been kissed?? Hahaha. Nope.
[x] Best eye color: GREEN!! ahh..heaven..hahaha.
[x] Best hair color: Brownish!
[x] Best height: Taller than me.
[x] Best first date location: Out a park at night.
]x] Best first kiss location: Below the stars. Lol! It feels like the dream I had! hahaha.
[x] Turn ons: Private and confidential.
[x] Turn offs: Jerks.
[x] Coloring: Erms.....
[x] Best article of clothing: What?...

[[-----------------NUMBER OF----------------->
[x] Number of people I could trust with my life: 3 and the only 3 I have.
[x] Number of computers you have: 1
[x] Number of piercings: 2
[x] Number of tattoos: None.
[x] Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: None. My mummy and daddy did though. hahaha.
[x] Number of scars on my body: A few.
[x]Number of things in my past that I regret: Hurms, a few.

---------------FAVORITES------------------>
[x] Shampoo: Sunsilk.
[x] Fav Color(s): Blue and white.
[x] Summer/Winter: Winter.
[x] Fav Cartoon Character: Got a lot!!! hahaha.
[x] Fav Food: Italian food.
[x] Fav Movies: I've got a few.
[x] Fav sport: Hurms, basketball? Oh! SWIMMING! lol.
[x] Word: Hahahahaha!! lol!!
[x] Ice cream flavor: Mint Chocolate!!!!!!!
[x] Holiday: Chinese New Year, School holidays and Christmas!!!!!!
[x] Furniture: BED!! heh.
[x] Number: 5
[x] Fast Food: Mcdonald's!! Ahhh~
[x] School Subject: Science!!!!!!!!! Love it~
[x] Animal: Dogs.
[x] Sport to play: Hurms, basketball?
[x] Sport to watch: Football
[x] Band: A lot!!
[x] Language: English!
[x] Weekend activity: LOL!! SLEEPING!! hahaha.
[x] Roller Coaster: Hurms, not a big fan. lol.
[x] Stores: Hurms, does food store counts? lol.

[[------------------RIGHT NOW------------------>
[x] Wearing: Hahaha. A torn shirt and a short pants. hahaha.
[x] Thinking about: My 3 bestfriends and my stupid chores!
[x] Listening to: Drops Of Jupiter by Train.
[-------------------FRIENDS AND LIFE------------------ >
[x] Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend? Nopes.
[x] Which one of your friends acts the most like you? Hurms, None.
[x] Worst Feeling?: Pain in the heart.
[x] What time is it now?: 3.42pm
[x] Do you have a best friend?: No, I have 3!! hahaha.
[x] Do you love your friends?: YEAH I DO!! SO SO MUCH!! lol.

------------OTHERS-------------------->
[x] Ever fallen for a friend?: Definitely.
[x] You know anyone that is feeling you right now?: No. I don't think so.
[x] Could u live without the computer? Yes.
[x] How many people are on ur buddylist? A few.
[x] Like watching sunrises or sunsets: Sunsets.
[x] What hurts the most? Emotion or Physical?: Emotion.
[x] Trust others way too easily?: All the time.
[x] Is cheerleading a sport?: hahaha. no!
[x] Houses lived in: 1
[x] Schools gone to: 1 pre school, 1 primary, 1 secondary.
[x] Last film seen in theatre: Spiderman3
[x] What do you eat for breakfast?: Anything I feel like eating. lol.

[[----------------RANDOMNESS------------------>
[x] I love to____with people? Talk
[x] What was the last thing you ate? Maggi. hahaha.
[x] The last person u talked on the phone with? Sister.
[x] Favorite drink? Juices.
[x] Do you wear contacts? Once or twice.
[x] Hugs or Kisses? Definitely hugs.
[x] What book are u readin?: None. Hate reading.
[x] The loudest person you know: PIG!!!!!!!!! hahaha.
[x] Favorite gear: My phone!! hahaha.
[x] Your backyard: Has more houses.

[[----------FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND--------->
[x] Thong: Something I would never want to own.
[x] Sandwich: Yummy!
[x] Fuck: What the?
[x] Purple: Pretty...lol.
[x] Love: Something unexplained.
[x] Elephant: Huge.
[x] Sugar: Hyperness! lol

An experience I would never want back! LOL!

So yesterday, I was on the way back from Redang to KL. From Redang we must take a ferry to Terengganu in order to get on the bus. So yeah we did. I got up the bus at approximately 3pm yesterday. I got up and I thought, something is not right. Something tell me this bus is going to brake down. And you know what?? IT DID!! hahahaha. I jinx my own thought! hahaha. That was shit ass funny! lol.


-Wha lah! A broken down bus!-


-In the middle of somewhere! LOL!! HEAD!!!!! hahaha.-

So, we were stuck at Terengganu for a while and seems like we are in some survivor game show or some sort. hahaha. So here it all starts.

On a beautiful Friday evening (not so beautiful because of the fact that we are stuck!) we were stuck somewhere in Terengganu with no food or drink to spare!(not joking! lol) All of us were so god damn hungry and all we have was...a packet of chips! Which will not last for 21 people. What did we do? We sat and plan out a strategy to overcome such nonsense.


-the meeting was held under the not so broken tent!-


-The pissed off committee. =p-


-The kids. With no entertainment, they entertain themselves by taking out kutu from the hair. =p-

After 1 dreadful hour, the bus finally came back to live!! I thank God for that and you know what? I jinx it again! hahaha. I got up and again I said, something is not right. And it did it broke down again and again and again! lol. At last at about 7pm, we thought, yeay! we are finally on the move. After 3 freaking ass hours, guess what, WE WERE STILL IN FREAKING TERENGGANU!! And even worst, the bus broke down again, this time it is in the middle of somewhere on the highway, at night! it was about 10.30pm I think. lol. Me, my cousins and my sister was singing to Keep Your Hands Off My Girl by Good Charlotte to kill our boredom. We made it sound like a band! hahaha. With Kevster as Joel the vocalist, Me as billy(keyboard/guitar), my sister as the dude with the bass and ken as the dude with the guitar. LOL!! SO DAMN FUCKING FUNNY!! hahaha.

We waited and waited and waited. NO BUS!! FUCK! hahaha. And then the clock strikes 12am. 2nd June 2007. Bitch's birthday!! lol. I thought, since it is my sister's birthday, something might happen. And it did. LOL!!!!! The bus cam 5minutes after 12am! hahahaha. That is so freaking funny. I should think more. hahahah. We reach KL at about 6am in the morning and I tell you, that was the longest bus ride ever!! 16hours on the freaking bus!!!!! hahaha. lol. This is a vacation I will never forget. It was so God damn funny. What a day, what a day. hahaha.

Anyways, that is it for today, lol. I still feel abit giddy from the trip. hahaha. Well, until next time, ciaoz and take care!! May God bless you all! =)